Enter Captain Nice, Woody, and Granite

Works under consideration: 16 (maybe 17)
Dark Angels troubling my soul: 1
Inspirations: #2 (today it’s Bill Hicks)
Pyrates: 3
Widgets to create: #112 A coffee cup with integrated ashtray

Characters
CAPTAIN NICE – A posing pedant but jolly nice.
WOODY – Peg hands, peg legs, and a peg nose, given to drumming and poetry.
GRANITE- A VERY angry and hairy Pyrate likes to set himself and others on fire.


INT/DAY
THE COMEDY ‘WRITER IN WAITING’ BLOG

ENTER CAPTAIN NICE, WOODY. AND GRANITE
THEY ARE PYRATES CAST ADRIFT IN 2007 AND SEARCHING FOR A WAY BACK TO THE 18TH CENTURY


CAPTAIN NICE:
There’s no one here.

WOODY:
Tis’ empty Captain!

GRANITE:
Belike it be!

CAPTAIN NICE:
Belike, it is Granite. It is empty Woody! How many times do I have to tell you that your speech is outmoded.

GRANITE:
May a thousand Mermaids caress YOUR HEART!

CAPTAIN NICE:
Thank you Granite.

WOODY HAS FOUND AN EMPTY WINE BOTTLE AND STARTS TO DRUM A TUNE WITH HIS PEG HANDS. HE BUILDS UP THE RHYTHM AND USES HIS PEG NOSE ON AN EMPTY RIEDEL WINE GLASS

JIM:
What is going on here.

CAPTAIN NICE:
A hah! Mr Writer we thought we’d pop in an enquire of our future in your magnificent sitcom comedy script.

JIM:
Still nothing boys I’ll let you know when anything brews. Now would you mind. I have a blog to…

TINKLE TUMTUM TINKLE, TINKLE, TUMTIM!

CAPTAIN NICE:
Put the pegs away Woody and follow me!

CAPTAIN NICE POSES LIKE A BALLERINA WITH A GODDESS COMPLEX

WOODY:
Belike!

GRANITE:
Belike!

THE PYRATES EXIT

CAPTAIN NICE: (V.O.)
Just leave the wine bottle Woody. It is empty and NO MORE BELIKES!

JIM:
What did I ever see in them.

- END -

Works under Consideration
Well it could be 17 but I had an error email saying my entry for the Red Planet Script competition didn’t get through because the inbox was full. Bugger. I’ve mailed another address so we’ll have to see.

Blackadder Remembered
I came across Blackadder Hall the other day while writing about Blackadder II ‘Chains.’ Well worth a look if you are a Blackadder fan.

Inspiration Today
Bill Hicks. In the clip above he’s telling the world why Marketing and Advertising are evil.Because of his honesty, rawness, and power. There’s never been anyone to match him. He wasn’t a great comic performer but he held you with the raw anger. RIP.

Now I’m off to record some words, sounds, and various silliness to use in my endevours to dominate the Interweb.

GRANITE: (V.O.)
BELIKE!

JIM:
I told you to bugger off!

*BTW if you didn’t know I am in Marketing and I’ve decided to gamble with my life by smoking in my sleep